Conflict

Agreeing to Disagree

Couples with a divisive issue have many paths they can take, but not all of them are good ones. Some couples will choose to sever their relationship permanently, and it may be more common among those who do not have children together. A long term relationship is often one where two people have realized they have many fundamental disagreements, but they have worked past many of them. Just one small issue could permanently divide them, but some are still willing to work out a compromise. Agreeing to disagree could be the best way to maintain their relationship, and many couples with children are willing to do just that.

Whether or not children are part of a relationship, it is important for two people building a life together to be able to find ways to agree or compromise. Small issues about where to spend each holiday can blow up into major gaps in any relationship. Even what is being served to commemorate a particular event can become a divisive issue when two people have their own traditions and emotional involvement.

Working out compromises is not always easy or possible. Some couples find that they would rather leave than create a plan that satisfies neither of them. Others are determined to stay together, so they may spend a great deal of time finding their own ways to settle the issue. Those who are still having difficulty may find that professional counselling could be helpful.

Being able to make compromises with a partner is part of adjusting to life together, but it can become more difficult as the years progress. One partner might feel they have given in enough, and they could be unwilling to do it even one more time. The person who loves them may have to step up to make their own sacrifice, and each of them will have to decide whether or not it is enough to save the relationship.